What is missing in my life?

Day 25 of The Vulnerability Challenge: What is missing in my life?

The cheesy answer to this question is that right now I don’t feel like anything is missing in my life.

And the even cheesier explanation for this is that I used to be missing from my life. I was so busy doing what I thought I should do and being who I thought I should be that I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted.

When I was a perfectionist, mistakes and creativity and fun were missing.

When I was a control freak, spontaneity and laughter and a sense of humour were missing.

When I felt sorry for myself, excitement, exuberance and pride were missing.

But as Tony Robbins says, when you feel like something’s missing, it’s a story you’re telling yourself about how your life should be. And I told myself the story of the kind of life/relationship/job I was ‘meant to’ have and what a terrible job I’d done of having them.

But I’ve started telling myself a different story about how the things I want aren’t signs of inadequacy or not belonging. The things I want aren’t happy endings for someone else’s fairytale. They’re vibrant, intrepid dreams drawing the best out of me.

By learning to love my imperfections, mistakes and clumsy first attempts, I’m becoming more me instead of the polished perfect version of a person I though I was meant to be. By having audacious goals and trying to achieve impossible things, I’m becoming the hero of my own life instead of waiting to be saved.

So although I’ve spent an hour and a half trying to come up with a clever, profound answer to this question, it turns out that in this moment a clever, profound answer might be the only thing that’s missing in my life.

Have an audacious day!

Photo by Daniel Reche on Pexels.com

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